The Weight of Words by Suresh Joel
When we have a lot of clutter in our words, we don’t see the main message. Words have power. It is very crucial to how we shape our lives.
The tongue is small powerful and dangerous. In James 3:1-12 it is compared to a an unstoppable fire, a bit in the horses’ mouth and to a rudder in the ship. If someone can control their tongue he/she is a perfect man. The tongue controls can control our way or life and speaks a lot of our behavior. The bible also says in Matt 12:33-37 that out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth talks.
What we say is of very great value. Our words matter. What we say to our children, spouses, friends is very important. It is better to hit a child and correct them that scold the child with words. With words, you never know when to draw the line.
Different types of ways to use words.
1) Flattery: Lies to make the listener feel better.
2) Sweet talk: Saying what they want to hear Prov 10:9 in the abundance of words, sin is not lacking.
3) Empty promises: Saying things that you don’t mean.
Words hold great value. Use it wisely. We musn’t use words for the above reasons. They will be in vain.
Importance of language: There is such a thing called the right word for the right season. In proverbs 25:11-14 the bible says words of wisdom is like gold!
Reasons to talk to others:
1) To encourage one another: 1 Thes 5:11
2) Talk to benefit: Eph 4:29
The above verses specifically say that we must use words for edification of our brethren, to encourage and to build up in the faith. Words if spoken must only be beneficially to others.
In Matt 23:4 Jesus speaks about the pharisees who give what we call “gyaan”. We give gyaan either about a matter we know nothing about, or as soon as something has worked out for us. As soon as something has worked out for you, don’t give gyaan. Preach only after you’ve earned the right to preach. We are not supposed to give advice to people until we have served them and once they trust our servant hood we earn the right to advice them. Before you wish to give gyaan to someone, check if you have served them.
When you have a problem with talking to others, check your motive! Are you proving yourself better by putting others down? Don’t harshly say anything. Speak the truth in love. Eph 4:15 – speak the truth in love so that we may grow up on all things. Flattering brings disaster- Prov 15:4; Prov 16:24
Talking about others: Beware of someone who can never talk about themselves but only about others!
Gossip (Prov 11:12-13): is talking about others in private. When you have to whisper about something, it’s mostly gossip.
Slander (Lev 19:16) : To defame them, mainly to take revenge.
Deceit (Prov 15:4)- for our own gain
Why does gossip feel so food? It makes you feel like you are better than them. In 2 kings 13:15 Absalom whispered about other people and made a group. A team against a common group. Prov 18:18 days gossip is delicious! 1 Tim 5:13 says when people are idle, they gossip. Gossip could also be for revenge (Eph 4:31).
Why is gossip unhealthy? It divides people ( 1 corinthians 13:16; Prov 16:28; John 8:44)
How to deal with gossip?
Matt 18:15-17; Eph 4:15, 29; Prov 20:19.
When you listen to gossip you are a part of it. Ask the other person these 3 questions- Is it true? Is it good? Does it help if I know. Confront people who gossip and not just walk away. If they gossip to you they will also gossip about you. There is power in confession so be careful what you confess – Prov 18:20-21; Prov 11:12-13
Talking to God:
Be careful what you promise God (Ecc 5:2). Long prayers is not what God is expecting from us. Do not use your words and time with God in vain, speak from your heart and think and pray. (Psalms 141:3)
Reflection by Alrina D’souza